How Depression and an Attempted Suicide Led Me to My Start-Up
It was September 2015 and I was 22 years old. Life appeared to be going in my direction in every way. I was living in Provo, Utah and attending Brigham Young University. I was recently accepted into a competitive business program and was beginning my Junior core. I had been married for a year to the girl of my dreams and we were coming off an incredible and adventurous summer. Some might say that my life was going perfectly. Obviously, I experienced certain challenges and difficulties, but I couldn’t complain, my life was great.
That’s when things began to go dark, and I didn’t have an explanation or solution.
As I went through my day, things that normally brought me joy and happiness didn’t do the trick. I was going through the motions and life didn’t seem to have any purpose. I didn’t want to get out of bed in the morning, I didn’t want to eat, and I didn’t want to be around anyone. Not even my wife. This alone was devastating and incredibly frustrating.
I began to blame myself for these problems, and tried to “get over it” and “buck up.” But this only made things worse as I couldn’t muster enough strength to do so, which in turn made me only get worse. Obviously, all of these signs were red flags. I knew that Depression ran in my family, but I didn’t think that I had it. I thought I was stronger than it and could overcome just a down day or two. This pride, ignorance, and resistance is what led me to the most traumatizing experience of my life, and ultimately the most influential experience of my life.
I came home from school and was more depressed than I had ever been. I was no longer me and had been overcome with something that I could no longer control or understand. I didn’t want to feel like this anymore, I didn’t want to continue to struggle, and I didn’t want my wife to see me in this form. So, I concluded that the best solution was to take my life. And that’s what I attempted to do.
Fortunately, I am still here today and was blessed to have the help to overcome the desire to take my life. When I realized what I was attempting to do, I immediately called my parents and wife. They assisted me in receiving the consolation and help I so desperately needed, and I was able to get amazing psychotherapy and medication. This coupled with a few grueling months, I was able to gain control of my emotions and get my life back.
I don’t publicly tell this story to receive pity, but rather to better bring to light the reality of Depression and Anxiety, which are correlated diseases. Depression is a disease. Just as real as Cancer or Diabetes, and I don’t believe this knowledge is as well-known as it should be. I think that our culture has made tremendous steps in the past few years to expose the reality of Depression, but we have a lot of opportunity to close the gap. It’s more than likely that someone in your life, whether you know it or not, struggles with Depression or Anxiety.
This experience, although traumatic, led me to want to help increase awareness on these diseases and provide whatever help I could so that others don’t have to go through the pain that I felt. I wanted to be able to mesh things I was passionate about and had a love for, as well as have the ability to make a difference. That was Depression, business, and style.
With that, Dulo Supply Co. was born. Dulo is a word from the Tagalog language in the Philippines meaning “end.” My hope, and the purpose of Dulo, is to provide customers with innovative, minimal products that simplify their lives, and forward the mission of ending the ignorance of Depression and Anxiety.
My mission, and that of Dulo’s, is to Create Change.